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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Pretense is an effort to avoid embarassment or humiliation over not being what we think is expected of a "successful" person.

In other words, if we aren't what we think we should be, then there is a tendency to pretend to be what we think we should be.

William James didn't see much value in pretense and suggested the following equation:

                               SUCCESS (actual accomplishments)
SELF-ESTEEM    =      _______________________
                               PRETENSE (unfulfilled expectations which
                               we are pretending to have accomplished) 

Obviously, in this equation as pretense goes up, self-esteem goes down!

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